In my ever continuing quest for a good laugh at religion, I went on a forum I frequent and created a topic titled “How many sky god believers have we got here?” with the message:

…muslims, jews, christians…anyone with a sky god…you know who you are. Make yourself known. I need a good laugh.

The topic grew with questions and comments and it took a while before anyone really came out with their religion, but eventually some did come out and I ended up answering the comments and questions in one go while sneaking in some quotes by Richard Dawkins, but what do they know…

TheKatsMrowl: Is it wrong that I do not believe in god but I am deathly afraid of the devil? I may have issues.

TCorp: It is not wrong. Your parents abused you as a child into believing in the devil as a form of discipline. You need to move on.

lallybroch: TCorp is my hero. He should have his own forum

TCorp: Thank you lallybroch. I’ve had a number of forums throughout the years, but I always found it difficult to keep up with them due to time constraints.

EssJay: …No, I’m just starting too look into satanism. I don’t get why people hate it.

TCorp: Satanism is perhaps one of the most misunderstood spin-off religions in existence, though, like all other religions based on bullshit stories, myth and dogma.

nameless fan: im a muslim and i believe in god

TCorp: I pity you for the fact that you will live out your entire life in a closed box covered with lies and myth, never knowing the true extent and nature of the universe.

whatdoyoucare: beliefs are funny ? what makes your belief a fact then Mr. Corp.

TCorp: Abrahamic religions are as funny to me as some African tribal or Aboriginal religions may be to others. As a matter of fact, all primitive religions are funny to me because the people that believe as so dumbed down by them. They lack the ability to think for themselves making them do all sorts of dangerous, foolish, silly and funny things.

Unlike religions, my knowledge of the universe is made fact through reason, logic, research and scientific principles such as 1+1=2 and people can’t walk on water without the help of the likes of David Blaine.

StinaLovesSlimShady: I believe in Jesus and that he was the sun of God and the reason I believe it is cause of prophicies I met a real prophet who told me thing about my past and then he told me the future and everthing he said about the future came true I asked him how he knew and he said Jesus told him.

TCorp: I believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster (may peace be upon His Noodly Appendages) that created the universe, starting with a mountain, trees and a midget. But seriously, are you on drugs? Have you never been to a school? Have you ever thought about the fact that the crackpot that told you that stuff was using suggestive psychology? I made money telling people bullshit stories during the summers when I was a kid, I know what I’m talking about. People believe whatever that’s convenient for them and even when I was wrong, they still believed I had superpowers brought upon me by buddha/god/jesus/a flying spaghetti monster.

Grow up

whatdoyoucare: I..have seen documentaries on recent “prophets” people who could foresee the future, sort of like Nostradamus, I even ran into a guy who so called could tell the future, but who knows.

TCorp: These “prophets” are very common in poor places such as India where everyone needs something to believe in and someone is always looking for a way to make a buck or two. They also use their power and influence over the people to get wealthy contributors elected into high political positions. In return, the police leave them alone when they’re caught molesting children.

TAMMIN: …………………I am Athiest. Can you tell me anything about myself from that? lol

TCorp: I can only say that at least once in your life, you most’ve used that gray thing between your ears.

3v0: I guess i consider myself a christian but im more agnostic than anything.

TCorp: You are what I call a just-in-case non-believer. Just in case there is a god, you’re keeping your options open. Bok bok boook…chicken

teenagedfan: i am a Muslim and u wont get a freakin good laugh. u should respect religions

TCorp: Oh, no? Watch me. AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!! *points and laughs*. But seriously, why should I respect religions? Why should religions be exempt from insults or critical examination? This is after all not 1578 we’re living in. Gods have been on the decline since the days of Neptune, Zeus, Pluto and Apollo (old Greek gods, for those that didn’t pay attention in history class). The only god left is the sky god really. And I’ve been up there. Here’s a newsflash for ya: Clouds are water vapor and there are no angels or gods up there. Please join us in the age of reason and leave the age of goblins, ghosts and gods behind you already. This is not a TV show or kids cartoon. People are dying every day for silly beliefs that have been indoctrinated from parent to child for ages. It needs to stop already.

You should all be ashamed of yourselves for blindly buying into bullshit stories and dogma just for the sake of not insulting your parents beliefs. No child is ever born muslim, christian or jewish just as much as no child is ever born democrat or republican, economic monetarist or neo-isolationist. This mass mental child abuse should stop at some point and it might as well be with my generation.

My parents were muslim btw, but that still didn’t stop me from thinking with my own brains and doubting everything around me until learning of convincing evidence for one way or the other.

Free your minds.

I’m making fun of everyone until everyone realizes how stupid religions are.

.TCorp has spoken.

The topic still continues…