It’s funny how some things make perfect sense in your head, but once spoken out loud seem nothing more than ridiculous.
I didn’t really feel like writing anything here for the last few days, because the things going on with my life currently seem too real to express here. I won’t get into details, but being in this situation makes me think of thing like, why I even have a website. So, I have a website…who the f#?k cares? In the real world, no one honestly cares or -rightfully so- sees any significance in moi having a website/blog, whatever. why should anyone?
The social “relationship” between a person and its website, I much like that of a person with its soul. Sure, you can have one, you can meditate to take care of it, but its existence is no more relevant in the real world than its non-existence.
But as with meditation, blogging starts as practice and eventually becomes habit . And as with habits, its necessity becomes irrelevant. It is merely done for the sake of it being done, and a strange sense of obligation.
Who cares?
Again, in the context of how and what i’m feeling right now, that question comes to mind ever so often. Who really cares and does it really matter? One blog more in an endless sea of virtual voices. Yeah, I “said” it…I wrote the “v” word. Of course I don’t use that word as an ignorant, condescending description of Internet visitors. There are people out there that have a twisted mental image of the internet that assumes that, since the Internet is run by and can only be viewed on machines, that the other people here are merely virtual and therefore not real. I’m not one of those people. I know that I’m real, and I also know that you -the reader- are quite real. I’m just not sure about the internet being “real” enough for me to talk with my friends about or think about when I’m not “here”.
In short, I have a nasty cold and a headache because of it and at the next sneeze I could makes this whole website go away and not really care about it.
Well, that’s just about as much as I can write about what’s going on with me lately without inciting an international emergency or making my headache worst.
Part 2. So after going to bed at 3am and getting up around 9, i’m in the ICE train on my way to work once more. Hopefully for the last time.
You know you’ve been somewhere for too long, when you get to witness the end of a renovation and re-opening of the local church. “Oh, look, they finally finished working on the old church…” (My work trip to Banbury, England in 2002)
You know you’ve been somewhere for too long, when two of your co-workers retire while you’re there. “Well, it was nice working with you. Heads up, you’ll be going home soon…” (My 2003 work trip)
You know you’ve been somewhere for too long, when the house next to your hotel gets new residents….TWICE! (My current work trip)
You know you’ve been away for far too long and way too f#?king often when the thought of a potentially forgotten locked front door won’t let you “enjoy your flight”, or your eyes starts to twitch on every goddamned Monday morning at the ring of the alarm, because you know you have to get up and get going.
Ooohwee, there’s this fine honey sitting right in front of me in the train…ignore what I wrote above, I kinda feel better already…
“…Oh, the passenger,
he rides and he rides…”
Iggy on the headphones…he’s got a thing with words…
PS: If you’re wondering what the hell this blog is about, and you happen to somehow find out, let me know.
Author: Tanin
Tanin in an information technology consultant specializing in complex heterogeneous environments. He can be reached through multiple social networking sites including Twitter.




…
Seems like a mixture of you being burnt out & homesickness or something like that.. *checks pulse* you’ll live
…
I understand how you feel about about insignificance on the net but…
I CARE!!!
I care about the “real” person whose blog this is and what opinion’s he has on certain matters. Also, that PM you sent me on the Em forum about your current well being took a sudden tug at my emotions and made a larger surge of compassion (not pity) toward you. At any rate I’m glad you told me a little more about what was going on with you and even more so, I’m glad with the judgement you had on knowing that I do give a damn.
March 11, 2004
This blog was a good idea cause words are a way of expression to remind us of lifes lessons or to remember all the situations we forget to mention. =)…Wendy’s post in OxTC guestbook
Your friend
Wendy
…
Oh yeah, forgot to post this.
(252) 636-5964
Call collect if you want.
“001″ should be the right country code to call here.
…
If nothing else, I think it’s damned cool you’ve got a blog.
-Shade
…
damn right
…

“who the f#?k cares?”
for e. me
…
good work
good style
and…you are right
…
I am now very far away from home…And after 60 days in Canada – I am really happy that I am from Europe